Tea & Automatons

Yes, I am fully aware of the new steampunk competition show.  I am not going to name it here as I am not feeling generous, but you can go google it if you want.  I wish everyone involved all the best.  I hope that they have a better experience than I did.  Here’s my account if you are interested.

A Steampunk competition show?  The concept seemed fun and when I was first approached over a year ago, I was happy to help.  At the time all the woman wanted was to find contestants for the show.  She felt that my extensive experience in steampunk would make me a better fit as a judge, and frankly I did not want to be a contestant.  I put out some feelers and posted about it.  That was the end of my involvement.   I have seen so many things like this begin and then never continue that I simply forgot about this one.

Out of the blue two months ago I got a phone call late on a Friday night.  The woman was talking so fast that I missed 90% off what she said.  Essentially she was calling to set up a Skype interview for a position as a judge on the show.  She told me they already knew I was “awesome”, but this was to see about my “fit”.  Mind you, I was given no information about how this would work.  In fact I was never even asked if I wanted to do this.

Two days later, after a quick text to confirm, I was getting interviewed.  As it turns out I should have dressed up steampunk for the interview, but like everything else that information was not ever conveyed to me.  My interviewer seemed very distracted the entire time.  At the end she finally looked at me and asked if I was wearing steampunk.  She gave me five minutes to throw on something.  Yeesh.  She told me she would be editing the interview, but I would probably not hear from her again.  She worked on many things.  I should however, hear back from someone in a week.

She did text me one more time to get a few photos of me “doing steampunk things”.

A week went by with no communication, then I got a phone call from another woman.  She identified herself and said she had two quick questions.  Where did I currently live and how old was I?  I told her Seattle and 51.  She said thanks and hung up.    That was the very last communication I ever had from them.

I heard through the grapevine that the show was underway, so I figured I had not been chosen.  It would have been nice to have been told.  It would have been nice to have been asked.  It would have been nice to have a lot more communication.   I suppose I am expecting far too much from Hollywood.

I was a bit excited at the prospect of doing the show.  I have such a love for the genre and it would have been fun to do.  Having thought about it however, I realize that I was being delusional.  Why would they would want a fat, old woman on the show, no matter how qualified she might be?  A part of me is also reticent to go to California during this drought.  It seems irresponsible.  And then my health took a turn for the bizarre, so I guess I should thank my lucky stars that I wasn’t away from home for these past few months of havoc.  That would not have been fun.

So, yes these grapes might be a little sour.  I was not deemed worthy and that hurts a bit, but I am probably better off not having to deal with tinsel town and it’s soul crushing machinery.  I am content to return to my relative obscurity.

By the way, I have been on television more than anyone else I know. but it was a long time ago and well, that’s a story for another day.

Edited to add:  By all accounts this show is a true example of “reality” television in that it is mostly scripted and you should watch it with a grain… no make that an entire salt lick.  The producers don’t know nor care what we think steampunk is and are often quite far off the mark.  I will watch because I have several good friends competing, but mostly just to get a good laugh at the absurdness of the main stream interpretations of our genre.